1) Please summarize your surrogacy journey thus far:
From the time I started the screening process in July of 2017 to birth was just shy of two years. After screening, myself and an absolutely incredible couple matched. Our second transfer in July of 2018 was successful and led to the birth of a beautiful baby boy (I affectionately referred to him as “Buddy”). Everything went so smoothly and little “Buddy” arrived perfectly on his due date.
2) Where are you in your surrogacy journey?
I delivered a baby boy (“Buddy”) March of 2019, I am now almost five months postpartum (and already thoughtfully considering a second journey sometime in the *near?* future.)
Image by Sydnee Marie Photography
3) Tell us a little about yourself and why you decided to become a surrogate.
I am 23 years old. My husband and I celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary in February and we have a very spirited and sweet four year old. I witnessed an acquaintance of mine go though a surrogacy journey and that intrigued me enough to further look into pursuing a journey. It was weighing on my heart and mind so much that I decided to do one- I just couldn’t get the idea out of my head! I believe family is so incredibly important and such an amazing blessing, if I could help another couple to add to or complete their family then I was honored to try.
4) What do you enjoy most about being a surrogate?
The moment that stands out to me most is being able to witness my IPs hold their baby for the first time. We were all crying and yet had the biggest smiles on our faces. It was without a doubt one of the most amazing experiences I have ever been apart of, the feelings I have when I think back to it are absolutely indescribable. Everything was worth it to witness that amount of joy and happiness. My heart feels so full whenever I remember back to those moments.
5) How has the decision to become a surrogate changed you?
I went into my journey very naive about the struggles couples face regarding infertility. And while I can never fully comprehend what Intended Parents go through to get to the point of needing to use a Gestational Carrier, I believe my journey has given me more empathy in regards to those issues. Through every step we took I thought to myself “How are they feeling, how can I make them feel as comfortable as possible during this journey?” I wanted to alleviate any stress they might feel. I can only imagine how nerve wracking it must be to have someone else carrying their child. I’ve attempted to adapt that mindset to other areas of my life with people I interact with. Overall my heart has grown overwhelmingly during this experience, I’ve found an even greater strength and a compassion for others through my journey.
6) What is the communication and relationship like with your IPs?
When matching it was important to me that whatever relationship we have during the journey developed “organically.” I would never want someone to feel uncomfortable or feel like they had to force communication.
We found a groove that worked really well for all of us. We texted and called throughout the journey (typically at least once a week). They attended “Buddy’s” 20 week ultrasound, and were both present for “Buddy’s” birth. I always felt support and encouragement from them. We still talk fairly regularly, swap pictures, and have a good relationship. I feel very fortunate to have been a small part of their story. Their family will always hold a very special place in my heart.
7) How was your experience working with AFS?
Mine was incredibly positive, I had zero issues with AFS as my agency. They are highly ethical, incredibly thorough, and overall facilitated a wonderful and rewarding journey.
8) What advice would you give to women considering surrogacy?
If it is on your heart and mind, pursue it. It’s a life changing experience. A support system is vital. There is a lot of ‘hurry up and wait’ before a transfer, so patience is key.
9) What would you tell surrogates considering AFS as their agency?
DO IT! Go with them! You will have zero regrets. I am so happy that I went through this agency and I highly recommend them.